"I'll stop searching for the answers. I'll stop praying for an escape. And I'll trust You God with where I am and believe that You will have Your way."

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34

  I worry way too much. God is definitely teaching me to have faith and trust completely and fully in Him. I have recently been worried about not getting enough work and where will I be when the children that I keep start school and are too old for a babysitter. By worrying I am just adding more burden and more troubles to my day than was already there.

Only God knows what each day will hold. He knows how many jobs I will work in one week. He knows where I will be in one month, one year, five years, even fifty years. He knows who I will marry and where he is at this moment. He knows how many children I will have. He knows if I will adopt a child or not. He knows how I will pay to put gas in my car every week. So why do I add more stress by worrying about things God already knows the outcome of? Worrying isn't going to change it or make it magically happen.

"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?" Luke 12:25-26 

If you are struggling with worrying today, I encourage you to give your worries to God and trust that He's got it covered. The plans He has for our lives will happen the way He has planned it since the beginning of time. Nothing or no one can altar that plan for our lives. And no amount of worrying can change it either or make it happen any quicker than He has planned. So please trust Him!!!! He knows what is best.

Homeschooling

Today, I had somebody ask me about homeschooling. I was homeschooled from the time I was in 4th grade through the 9th grade. What I remember about homeschooling is when I finally got to go back to public school I was behind in all subjects of school. I was in 10th grade when I started at the local high school. I think I was in an 8th grade math. I had been teaching myself for 5 years. I really liked the classroom environment. And I really didn't like that I was pulled out of that environment.

When I started homeschooling I only knew one or two other families that homeschooled. Today, however, homeschooling is a lot more common. Homeschooling is great if you do it correctly and with the right amount of structure. There was no structure in my home when it came to homeschooling. I remember I would teach myself while my mom would clean the house. There should be lots of prayer before just jumping into something this important for your children. If not done correctly it can really hurt your children. I personally think it was while I was in homeschooling when I first started struggling with depression. I didn't really realize how unhappy I was til about 7th or 8th grade.

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs  from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the father through him." Colossians 3:15-17

Any decision you make should involve lots of prayer first. Because our plans are not God's plans. And what we may think is a great idea or sounds logical may not be what God has planned for us or thinks is best. Whatever the outcome of the decision, it should be what God has told you, and should be for his honor and glory only.

"Anyone can achieve their dreams if they have the courage to pursue them."

I think I was in the 10th grade or sooner when I first decided that I wanted to be a photographer. I originally majored in photography when I was in college, it was my first and third majors. But I got burnt out on it as a major because I felt like my creativity as a photographer was being limited by the professor's expectations.About two weeks ago I made a dream come true. I saved every dollar I earned for the first four months of babysitting and I went out and I bought an absolutely amazing camera. It is currently my favorite toy.

Until about 5 months ago I had lost my love for photography. The last semester I was a photography major I was so burnt out I skipped class probably more than 6 times. But when I moved up here close to Nashville I started a project. I wanted to rekindle my love for photography by taking one photo a day for an entire year to show how much God is changing me and growing me.

I always take my camera to work with me. It is my goal and my passion to make time stand still from the perspective of a lens. The picture above is of the little boy that I babysit on Thursdays and Fridays. I try to capture the personalities of each of the children I babysit. Each one has captured my heart. And I want to capture their heart and their personality. Whether it's something like playing on the playground, playing with a sibling, a milestone such as a "big boy" cup instead of a sippy cup, a special moment with mom or dad, or even throwing a fit. It is always my goal to mostly get candid shots. Because you can see more of the child's personality in candids than you can posed shots. Also, anything that reminds me of God's love or how amazing he is. I also like to make time stand still by finding shots of something historical or unique. The photo below is of a farm close to where I work. I love it because it reminds me of the history of where I live. Twenty years ago Spring Hill was nothing but farmland. Since about 2000 it has boomed. It fascinates me when I pass a farm anywhere in the middle Tennessee area because it tells me a little bit about the town's history and heritage.

I don't know if I will ever do photography as a career. If that is something God has planned for me great. If not that's great too. Right now my heart is in using it as a gift. I have had 3 families look at my photos on my new camera and tell me they want some portraits done. And I also want to do portraits of my very best friend and her boyfriend. All completely free of charge.I really want to do some portraits at the barn that you see at the top. I keep looking at it and thinking of possibilities.

"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you", "plans to give you a hope and a future.Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13

The beginning of a new adventure.

Life is one big book of adventures. Some are good adventures. Some are not so good adventures. Each day holds a new adventure. Today, I am starting a new chapter of adventures in my book of life. This new adventure begins with being a full time live in nanny and babysitter. Only God knows what each day holds. And in each day is a lesson from Him.

"Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." - Psalm 37:4

This does not mean if we ask for a mansion he will give it to us. This means he will put what we desire in our heart.. He already has every day of our life written down, he wrote our life story before our ancestors were ever born. In this case, God has given me a desire to teach kids and to love on them and encourage them. This is not a desire that I first had from my flesh nature. This is exclusively a desire God has put on my heart. As a way to rekindle my love for photography I have decided to do a 365 day series showing what God is doing in my life, what he will teach me over the next year, and some of the adventures He will lead me to.I'm excited to learn what God is going to teach me here.

The photo above is my brother in law moving my furniture from my apartment in Florence, Alabama so that I can move to Spring Hill, Tennessee. There are so many thoughts and emotions on this day. I'm moving from my home; Florence, Alabama, of the last 3 years. I'm leaving my church family of 2 years. But, I am also excited to get to learn hands on how to be a mom. I'm excited to watch the personalities of each child shine.

Today was my first day to keep all 3 of them. It's so funny to watch my 7 year old nephew "head banging" in the car while Disciple is playing on the radio. And it excited me when my 2 year old nephew recognized a red lifesaver gummy, and he told me it was red. And my 10 year old niece is definitely coming upon the preteen years where she's on the phone all the time.